Stop putting things on your to-do list you don’t want to do.
How do you know you don’t want to do them?
You aren’t doing them.
Have you noticed yourself not doing a to-do? But still thinking you want to/should do it, so you don’t take it off your to-do list?
One of my favorite techniques is to keep moving it from one day to the next. Ya know. Because I’ll definitely do it tomorrow! And it just keeps not getting done as I move it off today’s list and on to tomorrow’s list.
Again.
And again.
And again.
Why do we do this? What will magically happen that would increase the odds that the to-do will get done tomorrow?
It depends on why we keep avoiding doing it and why we keep thinking we will/should do it.
When I notice myself moving a task to the next day on-repeat, I have started to ask myself a series of questions and maybe they’ll help you figure out what to do about that task.
If you have a to-do that just won’t get done, here are some questions to help figure out WHY:
1. Why is it on my to-do list?
Do I know why I am doing it?
Am I clear on how that task moves me forward?
Is it aligned to a vision I am clear on?
2. Is it a should?
Did someone else create the to-to/tell me to do it?
I am I aligned to that person’s goal/vision?
Do I actually want to do it?
3. Is this something I DO want to do, but I’ve written a full-on project as one to-do task?
Do I keep avoiding it because I don’t know where to start?
Is any of this resonating with you?
If you have a to do that you keep NOT doing, start by thinking about why you don’t want to do it (as evidenced by the fact that you aren’t doing it).
This doesn’t mean you will always not want to do it, but just that there is something currently blocking your path to get there.
Here’s what to do to figure out what’s blocking that to-do from getting done:
1. Get clear about the result you want from the task.
This might be a vision problem. You might not be doing the task because you don’t understand (yet) how it aligns with who you want to be or what you want to have in your life. A common example of this for me is working out. If you keep putting it on your to-do list, why? Why do you want to work out? What is the result you want from that? Focus on THAT and be realistic about what you are willing to do to get that result. I may say I want 6 pack abs (I don’t) or to run a half marathon (also no), but am I actually willing to do what it would take to get that result?
Do I know what it would take?
Maybe the lack of clarity is based on a lack of a strategy that you are willing to undertake.
It’s vital not to delude ourselves on what we are actually WILLLING to-do–it’s not just about what we say we want.
If this is the stuck, adjust the vision or the action step of the to-do to align.
2. It might be that you resent the to-do.
Maybe it was your idea and you resent having written it down.
Or it’s possible it was someone else’s idea, and you honestly just don’t want to do it.
If so, this may warrant a conversation with the person impacted by you not getting it done. Be clear about the vision you want in that relationship and trust me when I tell you that if you aren’t doing the thing you said you were going to do (repeatedly) the impacted person or people are probably also resentful that you keep not doing it. It won’t secretly go away.
Be clear about if you will or won’t do it and why and let that person or people know. On the other hand, it’s possible you wrote a to do down with every intention of doing it and now some kind of mindset around fear or belief that you can actually accomplish it keeps coming up. If you DO want to do the thing, consider Step 3.
3. If you want to do the to-do and keep getting aggravated or shaming yourself for moving it from day-to-day-to-day, stop.
If you are clear that you want to do it and why (aligned to who you want to be or what you want to have), it might be a strategy problem.
Have you written down a project instead of a step?
If so, break it down into each, tiny step and write THOSE on your to-do list.
Would it help to have a mentor give you some perspective?
Do you need some new information on a strategy that would work to get it done? What have other people done?
Stop doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
Try something else.
If you find yourself moving the same item on your to-do list to tomorrow’s to-do list….stop.
There’s a reason you keep putting it on your list. And there’s a reason you aren’t doing it.
Maybe you keep moving it because you don’t actually want to do it.
Free yourself from getting it done if it doesn’t move you forward towards the vision you have of a life you would really love.
And help yourself get it done by asking what is in the gap between writing it down and it being done-it might be a gap in vision, mindset or strategy.
(Top photo by Eden Constantino on Unsplash – thanks!)
(Bottom photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash-thank you!)
