The girl scouts are out to get me

I was not a Girl Scout. My parents gave me the choice of that or ballet and what little girl wouldn’t pick ballet? Thus, I have not experienced the organization from the kid level.

Sunshine joined a troop with her very best friend in the universe when she was in 1st grade. The troop leaders are fabulous–I seriously don’t have the intrinsic motivation those two women have to wrangle the girls and plan amazing events for them to participate in.

As I write this, Darling is off at a GS event with Sunshine (and Pixie, as it is a family event). I am (happily) home with a napping Toddler.

As much respect as I have for the GS, I am pretty sure they are out to get me. I understand that they support girls and encourage them and such, but they are making this momma feel inadequate and irritated.

It’s that darn sash. And the stupid badges. Since I was never a GS (as mentioned above), I didn’t learn to sew (one of the very first badges Sunshine earned). I know enough to sew a button on in an emergency, but that’s about it. And, honestly, I have no desire to learn more.

Thankfully, I have a dear, dear MIL who doesn’t flinch when I hand her a little stack of mending occasionally. And, she doesn’t think I am a terrible wife and mother for not sewing. 🙂

Sunshine was supposed to be wearing her new sash to the event today. Not having enough time to pawn this off to my dear MIL, I resigned myself to having to stitch the dang things on. I set aside about 45 minutes to put them on. How long could this take? Just a couple of (bad) stitches here and there to hold them until MIL could use her machine thingy.

Imagine my joy when they were IRON ON! Woooooot! Now, even I can iron something on! Yay!

I got everything opened, carefully looked at the diagram where they tell mommies the specific order the badges are supposed to be placed in and started ironing. According to the directions, it should only take 2-3 minutes per badge. Woot! I started thinking of how I was going to spend my extra time as I ironed….

I ironed the first badge for the 25 seconds and started to flip it over to iron the back. Hmmm. Not stuck yet. Okay, well, I’ll keep ironing. And keep ironing. And keep ironing. Oh my heck! What gives? After many minutes, the darn things were NOT stuck on. I had one set on, but the American flag wouldn’t stick. I looked at the stack of emblems I still had to go and realized that SEWING the puppies on would’ve been faster than this! Argh! But, I won’t give up! Oh no, Girl Scouts of America cannot make me feel like an inadequate iron-on-er unless I let them. And darn it, I’m not gonna let them!

(Questions enter my mind, like: how much force can an ironing board take? And what would exactly happen if I didn’t use the little tea towel, but ironed directly on the embroidery (totally flouting their rules)).

I now have two things ironed on. I have used up my 45 minutes. I warn Sunshine that her sash won’t be complete. She comes into the room and checks out her sash. It doesn’t even have the full troop number (the stupid number “6” wouldn’t stick!) She says, “I think I won’t wear my sash.” What? After all my efforts? I mean, I know it looks dumb, but come-on!


I am now looking for my hot glue gun, on the helpful suggestion of my sister. I wish I would’ve thought of that before.

Maybe they should have girls sew on their own badges as part of GS. That way, us mommies feel good about being a girl, too!

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